THE WALL THAT MOVED

by Andrew Marr, OSB

When Tat left the cottage to gather some berries, he forgot to bring a basket with him because his mind was on something else. If the Hermit noticed Tat's omission, he said nothing about it. However, Tat suspected the Hermit of knowing what was on his mind. Just the night before, the Hermit, while staring into the fire, had broken the silence just long enough to say: "If you seek after strange sights, be ready for the unexpected, and don't expect to like everything you see." Tat's attempt to draw an explanation out of the Hermit was like squeezing water out of a stone. For Tat, the warning was an encouragement to explore the gold brick wall that did not seem to belong in the Enchanted Forest.

On his way out of the cottage, Tat greeted the oaks who lived around him. In the four years he had lived with the Hermit, Tat had become a friend to many trees in the Enchanted Forest. Each one had a distinct personality which Tat knew, although he could never have explained what it was. One of the oaks was always grumbling about something while remaining grudgingly happy with life. A cluster of birch trees laughed good-naturedly every time Tat passed by. Tat's favorite was a maple who guarded his ground like the knight in shining armor the Hermit had shown Tat in a book stored in the cabinet. Tat wanted to be a guardian of the Forest like the maple. He did not care about the shining armor. His ragged clothes would do, but he wanted to be brave like a guardian knight.

Tat did not know for sure when he had last been in the area of the Enchanted Forest where the wall had appeared. As far as he could remember the turns of the seasons, the last time had been two summers ago. Unless his exploring was more deficient than he thought, the wall had been built since then. With a growing excitement that speeded his steps, Tat convinced himself that the wall was magic.

So absorbed was Tat in his speculations, that he was suddenly blinded by a band of violent light. Tat staggered against a yew tree who held him up as it snickered at the bewildered boy. Once the spots in his eyes receded, Tat squinted at the wall. It looked so different at midday! At sunset, the wall had glowed with subdued colors: red and orange and pale yellow. Now several shades of gold swirled before Tat's eyes, making him dizzy. He closed his eyes and then opened them again as he tried to accustom himself to the sight.

With a hand on his forehead to shade his eyes, Tat approached the wall until he was close enough for his shadow to break up the dazzling light. On a closer view, he could see what looked like little square bricks. But the wall as a whole did not look the way a brick wall should, judging from what Tat had seen in the Hermit's books. Bricks were supposed to be square and rough, but when he ran his fingers over the wall, Tat found that it was perfectly smooth. There was supposed to be mortar between the bricks, but there was nothing at all to hold them together. Yet the wall was solid enough. Moreover, the top of the wall was round, not square.

Tat walked around the wall and found that it formed a circle. The only break in its smoothness was in one place where the bricks made a curious knot. Here would be the place to climb up the wall and over it. As Tat's eye followed the curvature over the top, he became more curious than ever to know what was on the other side. He did not think there might be a rightful owner somewhere behind the wall who had the right to privacy. Tat belonged to the Enchanted Forest and so did the wall and anybody behind it.

Climbing the wall, however, was not turning out to be easy. The top was more than twice his height. Even though the knot would give him a foothold, the wall was so smooth and slippery that when he clawed at the bricks, he couldn't hold on to anything and he fell to the ground. Tat brushed the dirt off his scraped knees and sniffed the air. The smell was unpleasant enough to make Tat sick. The odor was definitely coming from over the wall since the wind was blowing from that direction. Now that he knew there was something terrible on the other side of the wall, as the Hermit had possibly warned, Tat was all the more determined to find out what it was. He leaped up on the knot but only landed back in the ferns once more.

So Tat decided to try something else. He took several paces backwards and made a running jump at the wall. His fingertips reached the curved top enough for him almost to get a grip. But just as Tat was about to shout aloud with triumph, his hand slipped and he fell back once more.

"How dare you mock me like that!" Tat cried as he pounded his fist into the earth. The bright shades of gold danced before his eyes in mockery of his futile attempts to get over the wall. "I'm sorry," Tat said to the ground as he reflected on what he had done to it. In his bones, Tat felt the ground accept his apology. Now it would help him. He rose to his feet, stepped further back this time, and ran at the wall again. The ground seemed to push him up as if it were a spring. Tat landed on top of the wall and started to slide down the other side. He thrashed his arms about around to balance himself and a gust of wind kept him from falling over until Tat could settle himself on top of the wall.

He lay on his stomach, exhausted. He kept an arm over his eyes to protect him from the light reflecting from the yellow bricks. For all of his curiosity, Tat was not quite ready to look. He still wanted a surprise to look forward to, if only for a brief moment. With his eyes covered, Tat imagined a garden filled with flowers brighter than any of the wildflowers in the Forest. In the middle there would be a clear pool surrounded by marble statues. But then the stench struck Tat's nostrils and drove away his dream.

The smell, foul as it was, had not prepared Tat for what he saw. All of the ground inside the wall was scorched so that no vegetation survived except for one lone tree. Its leafless branches and trunk still smoldered from a recent fire. The branches stretched out like bony arms ready to ward off a severe blow that could come at any time. Tat could feel that the tree was shaking, not because of the wind, but from fear.

At the center of the blackened area was a tiny house, so small that Tat doubted that he could have crawled inside it. The two rows of windows showed that it was a miniature two-story house, black as the ground surrounding it. Like the tree, it too was smoldering, but Tat could feel no sympathy either for the house or its occupant.

There was no visible sign of life in the house. The tiny shutters were shut and the front door was boarded up. Just as Tat was about to slide down the wall and investigate, a thick cloud of black smoke rose from the chimney. Tat stopped himself just in time to regain his balance on top of the wall. He choked on the stench carried by the smoke, but he refused to be sick even when the smoke filled the yard and reduced the sun to a distant haze. As the smoke curled around Tat, it seeped into his thoughts. Somebody was threatening him. He knew he should run away before it was too late. But Tat stood his ground. The Forest did not the person who was sending out the smoke from the chimney. Tat could feel very strongly that whoever was in the house should be made to leave the Enchanted Forest. Otherwise, the little tree under so severe an attack would never survive.

A sudden earthquake jolted Tat into the air. He flung his arms in all directions to keep himself from falling off when he landed back on the wall. Now the wall was thrashing like an enraged snake. The dark cloud from the chimney of the house closed in on Tat. Tat screamed, lost his grip, and feel to the ground. Quicker than thought, Tat ran to the dead tree, scaled its trunk and nested himself on the lowest branch..

The smoke pressed harder on Tat as he clung to the tree's branches and the branches clung to him. The smoke seemed filled with a cold desire to destroy every living thing. This desire wove its way inside Tat's mind until all he could think of was the destruction of the entire Enchanted Forest. As Tat's thoughts reeled out of control, he tightened his embrace of the tree. In turn, the tree tightened its comforting hold on Tat.

The tree shook and a blast of heat struck, but Tat hung on. The wall itself was slowly moving away from the tree, preparing for another assault. It was alive! Looking back to where he had climbed over the knot in the wall, Tat saw the face of a dragon with its tail wrapped about its head. The livid glow of the dragon's eyes blazed with enough hatred to turn Tat into stone. The dragon opened its jaws, exposing a row of yellow-brown teeth. A torrent of fire shot forth and blasted the tree again. Tat would have been cooler in an oven but even so, he was not yet cooked when the blast stopped.

The tree was throbbing with such pain that Tat had little thought for his own discomfort. Like the wall, it was alive and Tat knew it was his friend. He began to wish to see a human face in the tree so that he could feel closer to it. It seemed to Tat that the tree was not afraid of the dragon the way Tat was. It was absorbed in a sorrow deeper than Tat had ever conceived. The clouded memories of his earliest years were nothing compared to what the tree was suffering. Clearly the dragon was causing the grief the tree felt so deeply. But an evil dragon could not make the tree feel such deep sorrow. The only thing Tat could think of to understand the tree's feeling was to imagine that the Hermit were suddenly to turn into a monster and try to destroy him.

The dark cloud from the house thickened around Tat, coming between him and the tree's gentleness.

--Join the dragon in its hate, the smoke seemed to say. --Why let another take over inside of you as this tree threatens to do? I can protect you. This smoke can be yours to direct as you wish. All things can become yours if you let this cloud fill you with its power.

--But I have everything, Tat replied to the cloud.

A disembodied rage shook the boy and the cloud tightened its hold on Tat. Now the tree's sorrows flooded into Tat's heart so strongly that the two were almost one.

"I wish you could be happy again," Tat said to the tree.

The words were distant, as if far on the other side of the cloud. But the tree's sorrow felt closer to him for his having said that. A drop of water landed on Tat's head. Then another drop splashed off his hand. He tasted it. The water was salty. Hopefully Tat looked up. Through the cloud he could just see an outline of the branches around him. Salt meant tears, the Hermit once told him, and tears could only come from a pair of eyes. Another drop hit Tat full on the face. He grimaced, and then laughed. The tears began to fall like a gentle rain. The cloud rumbled about him, but the tears warded off its power, leaving Tat free to think his own thoughts.

Tat looked back at the dragon. To his surprise, its eyes had turned to a sickly yellow. When it opened its jaws, only a light puff of smoke popped out. It seemed to be asking a question rather than attacking the tree. Then soft colors began to glow from the scales Tat had mistaken for bricks.

"Where are these colors coming from?" Tat asked once he realized there was not enough sunlight getting through the cloud to be causing them. "What's happening?"

In reply, another misty rain of tears fell on Tat's head. He was starting to feel as comfortable with the tree as he did when he was sitting with the Hermit by the fireside and both were dreaming with their eyes open. A spray of red floated above Tat. The rain continued to fall, washing the cloud's grime from his face. The red materialized again, this time surrounded with other colors: yellow, blue, green, and violet. It was a rainbow! Like a gentle arm, it curled around the tree and Tat. It was singing to both of them in tones no words could match. The rainbow's colors sparkled off the dragon's puzzled face. It's eyes now registered the same confusion and sorrow as Tat had felt from the tree.

A sharp noise from behind shook Tat and the tree. The two upstairs shutters of the house slammed open. A handsome man with a well-trimmed beard and a face disfigured with cold fury looked out. He wore a black cape and a shrunken pointed cap balanced precariously on his mangy black hair. When Tat's eyes focused on the cap, he started to laugh. The rainbow brightened and the tree, too, thrilled with excitement. But a flash of the magician's eyes pierced through the rain and the rainbow like an invisible sword. Tat's mind was riveted to those eyes as they circled hypnotically and drew Tat's thoughts into its own whirlpool of hatred. Just when Tat's mind was almost gone, a roar from the dragon snapped the spell. A thin film of bright colors appeared between the magician and Tat as the rainbow materialized again. Its sweet fragrance pushed the cloud's stench out of reach of Tat's nostrils. It was enough to make him forget the magician who was close by. Tat basked in the shades of the rainbow as the bands of color flowed into and out of one another. Once again the rainbow sang a song of beauty. The tree and the dragon, too, rested in the rainbow's peace.

When Tat heard a grating voice utter strange words filled with harsh sounds, he paid no attention to it. The words seemed to come from a distant forest. Then the force of the spell filled his body with an electric shock that shook him loose from the tree. But Tat did not fall. Instead, he floated in the air, surrounded and supported by the rainbow. Gently the rainbow brought him up level with the tree branch where he had been sitting.

The magician cried out in rage and drew the cloud back to himself. He rolled it up into a little ball, then suddenly hurled it at Tat. Tat ducked. The ball bounced off the dragon and rebounded to the house, smashing the facade. Once again the magician uttered his discordant words and waved his bony hands in the air. It didn't appear that there could be very much power in those hands, but the spell catapulted the black ball back through the rainbow, caught Tat in its motion, and rolled him over.

Caught in a dark vortex, Tat could see nothing but the magician's eyes drawing him. There was nothing else in the world to think about, yet still Tat reached out his hand to something he had known a moment ago and wished he could remember. He gripped something. It was a tree branch. Then the rainbow broke through the vortex and again covered Tat like a cocoon. The cloud still whirled around Tat but now it had little more force than a tattered cloak in the wind.

"I'm not afraid of you!" Tat cried as he struggled to break loose from the rainbow's gentle bond, the better to defy the magician. "You don't belong in this forest!"

"I belong where I choose to belong," the magician hissed.

"Who invited you?"

"I did. Who else need I ask? I invite you and the whole Forest to come to me."

"You hurt one more tree or fern in this forest and I'll have the Hermit after you!"

The magician chuckled.

"I am the Hermit. Only now have I thrown off my disguise."

Tat's stomach dipped. For a horrible second he believed the magician. He grasped for a memory of the Hermit but could only think of the magician before him. The magician's laughter crackled like lightning.

"You would set me against myself?" the magician jeered.

Then Tat knew.

"You've already done it, you liar!"

With a burst of energy, Tat stood up and thrust his left fist through the rainbow and shook it at the magician. The magician waved his arm with a spell that stung Tat's hand like a swarm of bees. Tat quickly drew it back into the rainbow's protection, but it was too late. His fingers flattened and shrank into his hand. When Tat stroked the stricken hand, he felt fur instead of skin.

But at the same time he heard the shutters slam shut. A muffled howl of rage came from inside the house. The smoke dissipated, allowing the sun to shine with full strength. The rainbow gently carried Tat down to the ground. He forgot about his hand, so happy was he that the magician's power had been broken.

The dragon's scales glistened once more in the sun and its eyes shone brightly to match. Now the dragon looked kindly at Tat, but it was also looking at something or someone behind him. It was in love.

Tat looked behind him and, in place of the tree he saw a tall woman dressed in a light green silk gown. Long blond hair flowed down to her waist. Her face shone as the sun reflected off the tears left on her cheeks. A smile broke upon her lips as a delicate flower opening its petals.

She pointed to behind Tat's back to draw his attention that way. In the dragon's place stood a tall young man with wide blue eyes and locks of yellow hair curling about his ears. Tat's neck grew stiff from looking up at the giants since the crown of his head only reached their kneecaps. Embarrassed at intruding into the moment of their private joy, Tat quietly stepped aside, stifling his own curiosity as best he could.

"So you didn't go inside that house with that snake of a caster of spells?" the man asked the lady with a surprised smile.

"No, I chose to be true to you, as I thought you knew I would be."

"And look at that house now," the young man replied.

Indeed, the house was dwindling down to nothing. Soon it disappeared in a puff of black smoke. A black moth fluttered out of the smoke and winged its way out of sight.

"Just a few minutes ago it was so large," said the woman.

"What do you mean?" Tat interjected. "It was so little that not even I could have gotten inside. You must have seen it all wrong." Then he turned red when the two giants looked at him. "I'm sorry--I--- "

"We shouldn't forget our little savior," said the young man.

"No," said the woman. "Is he not part of our new-found joy?"

"And yes, I must have been seeing both the house and you all wrong."

"Who are you?" Tat asked.

My name in Honderek," the young man introduced himself. "I am king of the giants. My wife and queen is Hondara."

"How did you get here," asked Tat, "and get caught by that magician?"

"We had romantic ideas about spending our honeymoon in the Enchanted Forest," replied Honderek. "The warnings we received only made us want to do it all the more. We expected that the experience would make us wise enough to be good rulers. And it has--in a way we did not expect."

"We assumed we could outwit any evil power we met here," said Hondara.

"Only we failed to reckon on the ways our own hearts could go wrong," added Honderek. "I assumed I had no jealousy within me so I took no steps to control it. That allowed that magician to control it for me."

"How did you turn into a dragon?" asked Tat.

"By acting like one," Honderek replied. "It was my own magic that did it. It turned against me because of my jealous rage. I couldn't see that Hondara had been turned into the tree I was striking because of the fantasies the magician was putting into my head. Not until I saw you sitting in the tree, surrounded by such a lovely rainbow, did I begin to see the truth."

"I can't make rainbows," Tat insisted.

"It waited for you to come," said Hondara.

"I--help! Where's my hand?"

Now Tat realized that in place of his left hand, he had a rabbit's paw. Honderek took the paw in his hand and examined it.

"It appears to be a perfectly healthy paw," the giant chuckled. "At least the rest of you is still a healthy boy."

"You shouldn't have put your fist through that rainbow," Hondara chided him.

"I guess not," said Tat. "I should have know better. But I'm glad I showed that little man what I think of him."

"And you're glad your hand turned into a rabbit's paw?" Honderek teased him.

"No--but--what am I going to do with it?"

"Learn how to use a rabbit's paw the way a rabbit does," Hondara suggested. "Rabbits get on very well with two of them."

"Don't make fun of my paw!"

"But you're being so funny about it," said Honderek. "You just have to learn how to be a rabbit, too."

"I'm not a rabbit!"

Hondara took the paw in her hands and stroked it gently. The warm feeling her caress gave him made him almost glad he had the paw.

"So soft and furry," Hondara cooed. "But perhaps inconvenient when you're busy being a boy instead of a rabbit. I guess Honderek and I have been too caught up in our own happiness to think of what it has cost you. It's really all our fault."

"That's all right," said Tat hastily.

"And we still don't know who you are," said Hondara.

"Neither does anybody else. I'm just Tat."

"Tat all?" Honderek laughed. "Like tat name?"

"That's a wonderful name," Hondara assured Tat as she kissed him on the cheek before he could pull away from her.

"I take it you live in this forest," said Honderek.

"Of course," Tat answered. "I live with the Hermit."

"You do?" exclaimed Honara. "Then you must be the luckiest boy in the world."

"I think I am."

"Would you like a ride home?" Honderek offered.

"I'd love it!"

"Should I be me, or would you like a dragon ride?"

"You're not a dragon any more, are you?"

"I can be a good dragon anytime I wish."

"Oh. I think I may want to ride a dragon another time--like tomorrow--but today I'm a little nervous about dragons."

"So am I," added Hondara.

"Then I'll be myself and you can be yourself," said Honderek as he hoisted Tat up on his broad shoulders.

"Almost myself," Tat corrected him as he fondled his new rabbit's paw.